The Toddler Tip of the Day : "Never Tell Toddlers Plans in Advance"

Sierra is napping right now and when she wakes up we are meeting up with Michael, Adriana and Hendrix for a day at the Zoo... and she has no idea. This is a strategic move from Team Parents because although she is insanely smart she can not comprehend a change of plans. For example, if Michael & Adriana's car breaks down, a freak snow storm in June or if the Zoo has to close on account of all of the animals have escaped. If plans change we are in MELTDOWN mode for the rest of the afternoon and I try to avoid those type of afternoons at all costs. I have learned this the hard way so heed my warning friends. I don't tell her plans unless I am 1000% sure they are happening, meaning I will tell her when we are on the way there and I am certain the animals have not escaped.

Call it silly but this has saved us from many of toddler tantrums because friends suddenly had to head back home or something was closed unexpectedly. So thats my toddler tip of the day. Trust me on this one! If you have any toddler tips let me know! -Craig

Some Fathers Day tips for both old and new dogs alike!

Before becoming a father, officially, as in before the birth of my first son, I read a lot. I pushed my way through books about parenting, birth, education, and every other topic I could think of that would prepare me for being a father, and very little of it hit home. It felt like the books were written in a very matter of fact manner that were meant to push other peoples views and vanilla flavored facts down your throat, who wants that? A young man that is about to embark on the biggest, most exciting/terrifying adventure of his life? NOPE. I have to admit, when I was first asked to share some parenting tips, I quickly flashed back to late nights spent reading and trying to "learn" about parenting, but the simple fact is, you just do it. When my wife shared concerns over whether she was going to be a good mom, or how she would do this and accomplish that I always told her the same thing: you just do. And you know what, she just did, as you will do, and every parent out there is (hopefully) capable of.


Currently, I have two children, one of them is 9 going on 19, the other is almost 19 months, and I have definitely learned a lot from the both of them.  I am married to a wonderful, supportive woman, who is the mother of one of my boys, Hendrix, and my other boy, Christian, is from a previous marriage. I learned a lot going through a divorce and custody proceedings. The majority of what I learned is that it sucks, and there really is no "right" or "easy" way to go about things. I own an event planning and management company which allows me to be home during the day with my boys, it doesn't get much better then that! Ok, enough about me, here are a couple nuggets of wisdom if you will. Hopefully these will help smooth a few of the bumps for you new dads, and ease a few knots of tension for the seasoned vets. One of the things I try to remember, as a dad, is you CAN teach an old dog new tricks, especially if that dog is a sleep deprived father at wits end!


Tip 1: 10 minutes goes a long way! Sit down with your kid before work and read a book, plop them in the tub for a quick bath, or just tickle them silly out on the front lawn! This goes for after work, before you make that important call, during work (if you work from home), or in the middle of a big project. When you dont have time for quantity, go for quality! You would be surprised how far that short bonding session goes and how it can change both of your days!


Tip 2: Make it work! IF you are separated, divorced, or even if you were never married to the baby mama, make it work! Your child, no matter how much you think they cant, will FEEL what is going on between the two of you. Think before you speak and never allow yourself to get baited into a fight. Once you stop fighting that sail quickly runs out of air and becomes useless, eventually the waters calm, and you can see the horizon again.


Tip 3: Put the camera down, live in the moment. Documenting your life as a family is important, but not as important as being part of that perfect moment you are trying to capture so desperately. Some of the best memories I have with my kids are up in the old brain-bucket, and thats good enough for me!


Tip 4: Take care of yourself! Its easy to get run down, especially as a new dad with a high maintenance bundle of joy on your hands. If you are sick, exhausted, over-stressed, under-fed, or overweight it will definitely inhibit the fun, caring, and involvement you have in your child's life so learn to make the time to take care of yourself. A healthy dad is a happy dad!


Tip 5: Dont be afraid to jump in with both feet! A good daddy knows how to do a french braid, knows every word to his kids favorite song, is not afraid to crawl around the house (mall, park, side of the road!) and make dinosaur sounds! If you have a girl, you  better know how to set the table for a tea party, if you have a boy, you need to know what each bakugans strength is and how to battle!


Tip 6: Remember who you are! Your wife, girlfriend, baby mama picked you for you. Your kids love you for you, and you should love you for YOU. Do not let those Zeppelin LP's get dusty! You are cool as hell and you should not be afraid to show it! I dont care if you listen to Michael Buble or Michael Stipe own that ish and display it proudly! 


So there it is, hopefully these help and feel free to pass on any of your words of wisdom, I know I can always use them!

GUEST DAD: Pete Fazio (of DadAnd.com)

Hi everyone, I'm Pete. I write a blog called dadand.com with my buddy Marty. Our blog is a mashup of all things dad-, and dude-related. DIY, repairs, cars, gadgets, whatever. We like to teach our kids about the way things work and how to fix stuff and explain the world as best we can.

While we ARE a "dad blog" we're not really a get-really-sappy-about-our-kids-so-the-mom-bloggers-get-all-weepy kind of blog. We normally leave the sap to the other 6 million dad blogs, BUT NOT TODAY. Today is a worldwide internet exclusive.


Today I AM going to get sappy about my little bean, Julia. She's called peaches, bean, burger, turkey, tofu burger, J, J-bird, JJ, the list goes on. But after 4 years it's sort of landed on "J".

"Julia sitting on me. No joke, she peed on me like 10 seconds after this pic was taken."

On being a single dad

I've been a single dad for over 2 years now. Time is split 50/50 with her mom. She has no recollection of her me and her mom being married or being in the same house at all. One time after telling her that mommy loves Elvis she actually asked me "Why do you know so much about my mommy?". It's brought Julia and I so close that it's not even funny. We're best buddies, she completely trusts me in every aspect, and she also knows that even though we're buds, what I say goes, and when it's time to get serious and listen to dad she does it without (much) question.

"Hanging in Cape Cod. Photo by mom."

Daddy/daughter adventures

She's a great traveling buddy. We're always on some kind of adventure, it could be anything from going to plays, music shows, to our favorite: friday night trips to the Strong Museum of Play in Rochester, NY to something as simple as a trip to the store. We make it fun and make it a mission. She also loves helping me build and do DIY projects, like this treehouse I made from reclaimed deck wood.

"Going whale watching. yes she puked everywhere."



I've seen her grow in so many awesome ways. She loves art, music, nature, bugs, toads, everything. She's fearless. She loves food and trusts that if I ask her to try something that it's worth it. She'll at least give it a shot.

Any dad rants?

YES. Dads, stop yer bragging.

It  kind of bugs me when dads pat themselves on the back for doing stuff like doing tea parties and painting finger and toenails. It's just stuff you do when you love your child. It's expected. I'd almost go as far to say if you're pointing that stuff out then you're kind of saying it should be "woman work" and you're some great guy for "helping out the wife".

Any advice?

I always hesitate to give others parenting advice but If I were going to (and UH OH, it sounds like I'm about to right now), I'd say:

1. Let your kids make mistakes, get dirty, and get a bump on the head once in a while. I think of J like a little lion cub. She's going to poke around in the yard and explore and get dirty and pick stuff up she shouldn't and climb on stuff she shouldn't and fall down. GOOD. I try to be as poised as possible to let her explore freely and swoop in when my spidey-senses start tingling.
2. Don't baby talk to your kids. We've talked to J like an adult since she was born and the kid has an amazing vocabulary and can have a conversation.
3. Make them try new things every day. Food, music, games, toys. I know kids love routine and listening to the same CD over and over, and could eat chicken fingers every day, or tofu fingers, or whatever people are eating now-a-days, but damn man, break them out of that mold. There's nothing more annoying than an adult who won't eat this and won't eat that and picks the tomatoes out of their salads.

Oh, I'm tired of reading my own words and quite frankly I zone out when reading other parents write about parenting so I'm going to peace out. Of course we're always available for any kind of manly advice over at dadand.com and always would love some followers on twitter.com/dadandblog, or likes on FB: facebook.com/dadandblog.

Pete